Thanks to Fangtastik® Sookie Stackhouse no longer worries about replacing her blood soaked clothes on a waitress’s salary. With the stain fighting powers in Fangtastik®, garments can last an eternity instead of succumbing to set-in blood stains. Fangtastik® with Vampire Power sucks blood off fabrics and brings clothes back to life.

Clean up after the last bite:

Look for ways to win free Fangtastik® during “True Blood” episodes on HBO on Sunday nights.

Illustration by Yael Abramowitz

]]> http://yogaposeur.wordpress.com/2010/06/11/for-the-multi-tasker-yoga-while-youre-sleeping/feed/ 1 yogaposeur Corpse Pose Savasana Yoga http://yogaposeur.wordpress.com/2010/05/18/how-hard-is-it-to-find-obnoxious-hipster-photos-pretty-hard-if-youre-hipster-yoga/ http://yogaposeur.wordpress.com/2010/05/18/how-hard-is-it-to-find-obnoxious-hipster-photos-pretty-hard-if-youre-hipster-yoga/#comments Wed, 19 May 2010 02:56:03 +0000 yogaposeur http://yogaposeur.wordpress.com/?p=250 Continue reading →]]>

Don’t those pictures on Hipster Yoga look familiar? It’s like you’ve seen those chain-smoking, PBR guzzlers with the tattoos and facial hair before. And you have, but that guy in “Mountain Pose” with the mustache wasn’t on the L Train or in your yoga class (hipsters don’t exercise).  He’s actually Look at the Fucking Hipster‘s featured douchebag from more than a year ago. The “Bird of Paradise” sporting the fur coat is from LATFH‘s April 22, 2009 post. While the explanations of modified asanas are funnier than any caption on LATFH,  Hipster Yoga‘s attempt to pass the shots off as their own – affixing its own watermark on images ripped from LATFH‘s user generated gallery – makes them the ultimate poseur.

82-year-old yogi Prahlad Jani claims he hasn’t had a sip of water or a morsel of food since he was blessed by a goddess and given special powers as a child. Can this be true? A team of doctors and researchers at India’s Defense Institute of Physiology and Allied Sciences held a press conference last week to announce the conclusion of their 15 day investigation on Indian holy man.

Doctors found no evidence that Jani ate or drank anything and they found no adverse effects in his body from hunger or dehydration. They think that yoga exercises may have caused Jani’s body to undergo a biological transformation. The researchers said tests found that his brain is equivalent to that of a 25-year-old. – Epoch Times

“If Jani does not derive energy from food and water, he must be doing that from energy sources around him, sunlight being one,” said, neurologist Sudhir Shah. “As medical practitioners we cannot shut our eyes to possibilities, to a source of energy other than calories.”

Anorexics around the globe are eagerly awaiting further results on DNA, enzyme and gene analysis.  Jani’s claims has given people who starve themselves hope that life without food and water is possible. More importantly there’s no longer a need for Kate Moss (“Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.”) as Jani becomes a healthy role model or anorexics. Now how do you go about getting this blessing?

This Mother’s Day, I turned into my grandmother. Instead of stealing Sweet ‘n Low from the Kings Plaza Diner, I shoved packets of Sun Crystals into my yoga bag. As I absconded the green packets of all-natural sweetener from the coffee counter at my yoga studio, I thought about my recently deceased Grandma. If she was still alive would her sticky fingers swipe the stevia and sugar cane mixture and leave the little pink packets of granulated Saccharin, dextrose and cream of tartar behind?  My thoughts returned to sweeteners at dinner (life is good when this is what you think about) when I watched my mother make off with several Splenda packages from the Chinese restaurant. Besides the fact that I clearly come from a family of sugar-substitute thieves, what did our choices say about us? Does selecting an all-natural sweetener over an artificial one reveal anything about your personality? Take the sweetener quiz and find out.

Click for Yoga with Yoda

The best way to enjoy David Simon’s Treme is to get off the couch and do some hip openers. Stretch your hips and groins in Agnistambhasana and let go of your Sunday night stress (my yoga teacher always says “they aren’t child bearing hips they are stress bearing hips). Feel tension building from watching the recreated tough times in post-Katrina New Orleans? Then go deeper into the pose by folding forward on the exhale. Don’t round your back as you place the popcorn bowl in front of your stacked shins and remember to press through your heels and spread your toes. When you are done with both sides you’ll be ready to swing to that New Orleans music.

Swami Ramdev is India’s version of Richard Simmons. Instead of an afro and bedazzled red short shorts, Baba Ramdev sports a bushy beard and a saffron loincloth on his Sweatin’ to the Oldies (ancient Indian yoga asanas) campaign to “whip India into shape.” Ramdev’s believes that yoga and pranayama can cure an array of diseases, homosexuality (Richard Simmons would never say that about gays!) and now political corruption. The New York Times reported earlier this week that Ramdev is launching a political party “that would field candidates for each of the 543 parliamentary seats in India’s next general election in 2014.”

“What the people need is honest, brave and responsible leadership,” he said in an interview at the sprawling campus of his rapidly expanding yoga, natural foods and medicine empire in northern India. The country’s political system is riddled with corruption and riven by the deep divisions of religion and caste, he said. Tapping into the ancient Indian wisdom that gave birth to yoga, and the holy texts like the Vedas and Upanishads, is the only way to excise those cancers, he contended.

Good luck Baba Ramdev because in YP‘s experience people aren’t as grounded, balanced and just when they step off the mat or close the The Yoga Sutras. Just ask Kula Yoga Project about yogis that stray from the path…

Instead of popping a squat over the nasty public restroom bowl, go into Chair Pose. Keep your tushy pristine from pee on the seat and strengthen your ankles, thighs, calves and spine while emptying your bladder in Utkatasana. For shy pee-ers, turning public potty time into a mini yoga practice will allow them to relax and feel balanced so they can let the flow go.

Don’t forget to flush — if it’s gross come into Utthita Hasta Padangusthasana I (Extended Hand to Big Toe Pose) and hit the toilet lever with your foot as you lower it to the floor with an exhale.

If you sprinkle when you tinkle, please be neat and wipe the seat.

More Yoga Anywhere, Anytime: Getting Arrested

This Is Terrible, You Should Watch It of the Day: The Trouble With Harry Potter (The Daily What)

Sexual Abuse, Brainwashing, Corruption and Yoga! (Yoga Dork)

The Return of Master Celebutard Brandon Davis (Agent Bedhead)

My Girlfriend Seduced Me Into Yoga Class. Love Ensued. And Then We Broke Up.  (Elephant Journal)

Madonna Linked to African Sweatshop (Celeb Jihad)

Yoga for Waitresses (The Joy of Yoga)

No, Rihanna Wasn’t Kidding with this Outfit (Amy Grindhouse)

The Back Row: It’s Way More Fun to Be a Hater (Fucked at the Ballet)